Family Join Requests

Members of your church can ask to be linked to an existing family from inside the member portal -- they can not silently attach themselves to another household. Every request lands in a review queue where staff (or the family's primary contact) approve or reject it. This article walks through the full flow from both sides.

Why a Request, Not Self-Service?

Direct self-service to "add yourself" to a family would create real risks:

• A teen could attach themselves to a different family for check-in pickup.
• Someone could accidentally join the wrong "Smith Family" out of two with the same name.
• A spouse joining post-marriage should be visible to staff for membership and giving alignment.

The Family Join Request flow keeps families in control without forcing every change to go through staff.

Member Side: Sending a Request

How a Member Submits

1. The member signs in to the member portal.
2. They open their My Profile or My Family page.
3. They search for the family they want to join by name (e.g., "Smith Family").
4. They select the matching family from search results.
5. They pick the Role they are requesting:
   • Spouse
   • Parent
   • Child
   • Other (cousin, grandparent living in the household, non-relative housemate, etc.)
6. They optionally write a short Message to the reviewers (e.g., "Just got married, joining the Smith family").
7. They click Send Request.

The request is saved with a Pending status. The member will see "Request submitted -- awaiting review" on their profile until a reviewer takes action.

One Pending Request at a Time

A member cannot have more than one pending request to the same family at once. If they need to update or cancel a request, they should reach out to a staff member.

Staff Side: Reviewing Requests

Where to Find Pending Requests

1. From the admin portal, open the Family Join Requests queue (or open the family that has the request and look for the Pending Requests banner).
2. Each pending request shows:
   • Person -- Who is asking to join
   • Family -- Which family they want to join
   • Requested Role -- The role they picked
   • Message -- Their explanation (if any)
   • Submitted -- When the request was sent

Approving a Request

1. Click Approve on the request.
2. Optionally add Review Notes for the audit trail (e.g., "Confirmed marriage, approved by Pastor Joe").
3. The system will:
   • Add the person to the family with the role they requested.
   • For "spouse" requests, set their family role to spouse.
   • For "child" requests, set the role to child and mark Receives Mail = No (children do not receive mailings by default).
   • For "parent" or "other" requests, set the role to other.
   • Record who approved the request and when.
4. The person will see "Approved" the next time they open their profile, and the family page will show them as a member.

Rejecting a Request

1. Click Reject on the request.
2. Optionally add Review Notes explaining why (e.g., "Wrong family -- did you mean the Smith family in Springfield?"). Notes are saved to the request record.
3. The family is not changed. The requester sees a "Rejected" status on their next portal visit.

Status Reference

Audit Trail

Each request stores:

• The submitting person's ID
• The target family ID
• The requested role
• The optional message
• The reviewer (person ID), if any
• The review timestamp
• The review notes
• The current status

This is enough to reconstruct who asked to join whom and what staff member made the call. For sensitive families (e.g., custody-disputed children), this trail is your protection.

Best Practices

1. Review weekly -- Don't let pending requests sit. Stale requests frustrate members.
2. Verify ambiguous requests by phone -- If two families share a last name, contact the requester before approving.
3. Use review notes -- Even when the request is obvious, a one-line note ("confirmed by spouse") makes the audit trail useful months later.
4. Train staff on rejection wording -- A polite, redirective rejection ("Looks like you meant the other Smith family -- try again") is better than a silent rejection.

Related Articles

• Family Management
• Portal Self-Service
• Person Profile Overview